This morning before work was the WORST ever morning. I am still feeling completely incompetent and emotionally wrecked. Poppy woke at 620am, late for her as you'll know if you read this regularly, so I decided to get her up and give her a bottle downstairs rather than putting her back to bed after it. I don't know if this was the reason, if she was hungry after her milk, or just being a total cow, but from then on she tantrum-ed for 2 hours until we left the house. And I mean this new, extreme, eye-wateringly loud kind of tantrum she's developed. All I was trying to do was have a wash in the bathroom so I put her down on the floor, like I do each morning; today it resulted in a spectacular display of anger and frustration, seen as her throwing herself onto her front and screaming at the top of her lungs, arms and legs going rigid and throwing her head back. Poor hubby was trying to sleep before going into an afternoon shift, but could only withstand his natural curiosity for so long before coming to see just what the fuck what going on.
And that was just one of the many she had in that 2 hour period. I went into work feeling the worst I've felt for a good while, that pressurised & trapped feeling back in my very core. Wondering how I ended up with such a horrible child. If she will ever stop this melodramatic behaviour. Maybe she's just not very nice and will always be like this. I don't want to dislike my offspring, it goes against the natural order of things. Even a colleague asking if I was ok, I wasn't my normal self today, brought me close to tears as it meant that the facade I was usually pretty good at maintaining when I feel crap was too much to keep up.
There's only one solution to this dreadful day. A glass of cold white wine.
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Oh hun I so feel your pain. The second we say no, or move him away from something dangerous, or refuse to give him a pair of scissors that he's spied in a different room hidden in a drawer, he just goes bananas. I have been reduced to sitting and staring at him, because I can't believe so much anger can come from someone so small and there's absolutely nothing I can do about it.
ReplyDeleteHe just goes from zero to full blast in a second, and it's usually triggered by being hungry, but instead of nicely asking for food or milk he just screams and hits me :(
So sorry you had such a bad day, and so sorry we seem to be getting to the terrible twos a bit early. This is the terrible twos right? It's not going to get ... worse? Is it?